Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in blogsareshit's LiveJournal:

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Friday, July 24th, 2009
11:49 am	Hello again! blogs are shit Once again I have come out of my retirement to talk about an interesting LJ I have stumbled across. shane-g.livejournal.com/ There is little of interest here- three posts of a few words from 2003, but the biggest one is a piece called Andrew Ellard's Career. It is essentially a hate filled piece aimed at Andrew Ellard for some reason. What did this person ever do to you? There is little of real note in the post, apart from the following line- Meanwhile Ellard's writing career continues to do a convincing impression of a long dead corpse. Ellard might think he's a tv writer, but Dennis Potter he aint - he isn't even Harry Potter. ...I see. What is that supposed to actually mean? Anyway, the action really starts in the comments section. A majority of them are anonymous, which leads me to think that they are written by one or two people going in circles. Most of the posts are actually focusing on Ganymede and Titan, the Red Dwarf fansite that he frequents (for obvious reason, he was a fan of the show before being hired by them). The hilarity really begins here, because there is so much stupidity expressed that it's difficult to express it outside of just quoting them. So I will. It means that if anybody new posts at either G&T or NTS now they are immediately taken as a troll. The worst intentions are read in the most innocent of comments, because they assume they're having a conversation with "Shane G" again. Scare quotes because actually we know his name. *cough* Kirk *cough* I doubt it. Wko the fuck is Kirk? And he came across as a fat fuck in his slow, lumbering manner, and the way he kind of belched out excessive heat in confined spaces during the summer months. Fuck off Lardy Dumbfuck with your smelly folds of fat, it's too stuffy in here as it is! LOL HES FAT IM SO FUNNY I am registered as about seven people on G&T, and a couple of these personae are accepted by the community. I parody the G&T-ers and they have no idea I am not one of their own. I am able to do this well because I have worked with a couple of them before and their mannerisms and behaviour are very familiar to me. I am waiting for something decent to do with this though. Another six G&T personae are sustained by two people that I know well, so there really aren't that many real people posting there. Most of these joined up during the "sudden peak interest" time of Back to Earth, where the sudden increase in registrations wouldn't prove suspicious. I advise everybody else register several times as well, if only because it means that at any moment we can suddenly pull the plug and leave them with about five people in the end who truly care about Red Dwarf! Fun huh? Think of their silly fat faces and you'll know it's the right thing to do! :-D This is an absolute corker of a post. So you're going to behave like a normal user for a while with these accounts and suddenly stop posting without saying why? Woah, that's gonna burn them!!! Andrew Ellard is a fat fuck. At school we called him "Andrew Smellard" and "Ellard by name, Lardy by nature". Please let these nuggets stay with you, and pass them on as you fit. Are you 6 years old? That's the most stupid insult I have ever heard. Lol; have them put that on their recommendations cycle. I'm sure that a quote from this thread will eventually turn up on the cycle. However, I'm not sure if you guys are aware that it's ironic. You know, being silly in a self-referential way... Dwelling so much on Lardy Cockfosters and the fuckgordons of Gaymede and Titan makes me want to crack open my anus. ? You shouldn't vent your anger or frustration here immediately after an event there. Leave it a while and be a bit more obscure; if they're still reading this they'll be able to trace what you're referring to, and then that persona is wasted. Also it looks like your project is actually attached to you rather than a puppet, so be careful. Dammit, you'll ruin the awesome acot of sabotage we're going to kill G&T with!!!!1!!11 I'm sure they wouldn't think of themselves as racist. It's that "Big Brother in racist row!" scenario where they'd be shocked that their use of an offensive word might cause offense. They'll cry that they're middle class liberals who would only ever be racist ironically, but you know. We're all middle class liberals - we don't have to be fucking twats with it and use it as an excuse to be offensive. Anyway don't worry about it. This blog is here because we all have a problem with those guys. It's okay but I have a feeling we may have to set up a proper website at some point. Shane G - fancy setting up a proper website at some point? This is where it gets funny. One of the reasons we'll be starting a (private) group is that our conversations are none of your business and we're aware that you for some reason think it is our duty to reveal ourselves to you. It is not, and we have no interest in doing so. For your information, we object to your personalities - your smugness, your spite (there's irony for you), and what appears to be racism at times - not the fact that you have a group. Wait a mo- these guys are going to start a private group to talk about Andrew Ellard and G&T for some reason? For what reason? I cannot understand how anyone can be slighted by these people so much that they would start a group dedicated to slagging off another website. It's totally bizarre. *cough*. Of course, there was a few posts defending the site, here is one of them- You can't use "the internet is a diverse ecosystem" as an excuse to rather bitterly tear into one man and his entire career, regardless of how you feel about him. The internet is a diverse ecosystem, yes, but that doesn't mean that we should look at, say, White Supremacists and place a finger on our mouths and say, "Ooh, those delightfully cheeky rapscallions!" The problem at the moment is that you are being unfairly cruel and hateful to a man for two reasons. 1.) He works for Grant Naylor Productions, although sometimes he hasn't, and 2.) He is perhaps a little larger than you would perhaps like him to be. If you can't look at it this way, remember that you're visiting this place and reading these posts entirely according to your own whim, when you could be ignoring it as everybody reasonable would suggest you do. Yes, but you're posting it in the first place. The S.S. Reasonable left the harbor the moment Shane-G decided to post his angry rantings in the first place. It also crashed into a rock and sank to the bottom of the bay because there wasn't anybody steering the bloody thing. You visit here because it fascinates you, it's as simple as that. We come here because, yes, we are fascinated, because none of us can quite understand why you'd want to lay into Andrew. He's never come across to me as anything other than thoroughly pleasant. The few times he's posted something questionable on a forum have quite clearly been jocular in nature. Anyway, we will soon have a group to continue what we are currently doing here, and its URL will not be shared anywhere you'll find it. So keep coming here if its current posts cheer you up, but you will not find much new. Feel free to continue this discussion elsewhere without us G&T rabble involved. Frankly, I'd rather not have to look at it anymore. Out of sight, out of mind - best solution for this "problem". But keep in mind; The problem with hate is that you can't do anything with it. Other negative emotions can be channelled positively, but hate? The only thing you can do with hate is hate more. It's remarkably unhealthy, and it can lead you to say and do some irrational things. Think very carefully before you set up a community solely for people to discuss their hatred of a man who is, not in the grand scheme of things, particularly important. That way madness lies. Meanwhile it'll be interesting to see whether you can settle your battles with Norman Lovett, Iain Lee and others while we're invisible, and generally stop being so unpleasant to people who visit G&T and NTS with a genuine interest in the subjects they discuss. Norm's been silly. He really has. His spat with GNP was unwarranted, and he didn't need to fly off the handle the way he did. Coming onto G&T to post even more grump is probably the worst thing he could have done, too - that is not how you deal with negative criticism. As for Iain Lee, I think our rants against him are mostly in jest. He hates Red Dwarf? Fair enough. It's not everybody's cup of tea, but then again not everybody likes Iain Lee, either. I can't say I've ever noticed anybody being particularly unkind to newcomers on G&T. Then you get people who come along like Tonguetied who have what is perhaps an Aspergeresque approach to fandom. If you go onto a Red Dwarf discussion board and try to stir up a "new" debate that isn't new at all, retreading old ground that every Red Dwarf fan has discussed a thousand times over and done to death, there's no point. Yes, the plot of "Backwards" doesn't make sense when you play it forwards. We know that. We've known that since 1990. Right now we're discussing how Back to Earth affects the show's canon, or lack thereof. In a couple of years no bugger'll care because we'll have discussed it to death. Come back in 2012 and ask us whether or not we think the Rimmer in BtE is the original Rimmer or not and see what the response is. I doubt you'll be surprised. Stop being such cunts, in other words, and perhaps you'll find that we disappear altogether. The irony of this is just sickening. heh. So yeah, what is the point of this post? I know what you're all thinking- this really isn't a post ripping into a blog. Normally my posts are to point out that a blog is full of shit, random sentences (see my last rip), memes or just reflects the 'stupid' that infects the internet. This post is ripping into one post, which is the only substantial content the blog has put out. This post is essentially about irony. I have littered this post with it (kinda reflecting on this blog in the process)- can you find it all? I find it incredibly ironic that a group would call a group of fans 'pathetic' would then set up a group dedicated to those fans. Fuck it, let's just call them 'G&T fanboys' and move along. This is the blogsareshit bloke, saying, "I didn't use the word 'fuck' very much in this post" (Comment on this)
Thursday, April 2nd, 2009
7:58 pm	I'd like to thank computer bots blogs are shit Despite me not updating this blog for a long time, my blog comes in fourth in a Google search for "blogs are shit". Hey, if I actually cave a fuck about this blog maybe I won't need the quote marks!! (Comment on this)
7:05 pm	I have returned!!! For good reason blogs are shit lismu.livejournal.com/ I... The words just.... they really don't come very well, mainly because this blog is maintained by someone who quite clearly has no real grasp of the English language. This isn't a "oh look, Americans don't like the letter 'u' LOLOLOL" kind of lack of English usage, it is truly incomprehensible. Oh well, I guess I will start with the most recent post, titled 'meh' arrarraaar watching them little icons pop from red to yellow to red to yellow to red and it's making me insane(ly jealous) this is an excuse to use my shiny new icon. EDIT//omg omg omg this is seriously really really bad for my mental health, it's a dark growing strangling feeling right below my throat bit above my heart. insane, i'm telling you. it's so fucking bad cause you know they're talking, you can see them talking, but you have no idea wtf. :( The problem with this rip is that it's so entirely difficult to make this person. The posts talk for themselves. What icons? 'red to yellow to red'? That doesn't make sense! And what 'shiny avatar'? I cannot see any avatar there. The edit doesn't add anything that can be considered to be paragraph. I seem to remember being taught that each paragraph is supposed to have a point. Take for instance this paragraph, where I point out that the post makes no sense. Anyway, on to the nest post, titled 'BOOYA' 18 stacks on malygos ahahaha people going WTF WHO'S STACK IS THAT?! well all the people except kaoz who was going OMG LOOK AT MY SHINY 6K DPS! and people telling him dude look at naava's dps and she's a healer! WHATEVER 6k DPS! hee i love that fight <3 (also it felt good to know that A&A had been talking about me and how i'm insanely good at healing and that one pally healer can't do even 1/4 of the hps i do without buttloads of overhealing. and not really even with that. it is extremely great feeling to be recognized like that even if it is a silly game (and especially coming from A's mouth it feels even 10x better...)) Well, I see that the first post I quoted continues a story from this post. I think. Now for 'keep trodin' on' *deep breath* his voice is the best medicine i got right now. smiling and listening to reggae. I searched for 'keep trodin on' in Wikipedia, and came up bagel. Same with 'keep tryin on', which is odd, since it was a suggested alternative search from Wiki. 'Keep Tryin' is an entry though. Sadly, the singer seems to be female. Blue Sky Mine is sung by a male, and that is about as close to an explanation as I can make. vittujen vittujen vittujen kevät ja äh. saisko mitenkään et elämä ei ois näin vitun monimutkikasta? ... OK... we had our project week. wood cutting was the theme. it was fun. i didn't like the printing. i fell in love with parchment paper. we talked about sperm and it's usage as moisturizer with L&P today. we laughed. was fun. i bought me a traveler's tundra mammoth. heeee i love it. it's hard to form coherent sentences. downing 25-man maexxna with 19 people. tingling feeling in my tummy, staying up all night thinking or even better: talking with avi. listening to reggae (anytime me look ina your face you make my world a brighter place). i has a bucket. drake hates mah bucket D: watching x-files season 2. i played mgs 3 today after a long pause. i was rusty. first thing i step into a trap (and eva calls me like "oh yea there's traps there" and i'm like "...i knew that.") then i step into a mine. and then i step into another mine. and then i run to an electric fence. then i forget how to shoot (...) and get alarm and poop loads of guards and guard dogs gnawing at my butt. i die and commence massive amount of facepalm. thank god i didn't leave the game to the ocelot fight, i would have seriously ripped my own spine out if i would have lost to him. After this is some scetches. Anyways I guess there are a few lines that stand out for me. i bought me a traveler's tundra mammoth. heeee i love it. Apparently this is an object in WOW. I really didn't need to know that. it's hard to form coherent sentences. Well, it's nice to see this person admitting it. downing 25-man maexxna with 19 people. ...and proof of the former sentence. watching x-files season 2. wow, mulder alienz OMG they chase them and he's all "SCULLY!!!!" HOLY FUCK THERE IS MORE. I thought that the page on first watch is it. Sadly that is not the case. This absolute pile of shit blog seriously deserves to get deleted. My initial comment stands- it's just so HARD to make fun of this blog any further than posting what is in it and saying 'this is its contents'. fuck. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 13th, 2006
9:38 am	I'm alive blogs are shit For those of you who thought I might have been killed by emos, I'm still alive. I'm just really busy recently with the whole 'I want an education' thing. I'll give an update soon, just not now. (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006
5:03 pm	Vladimir's War on Blogs blogs are shit great article from http://www.tangomaster.com/vladimirs-war-on-blogs/ Ever since the foundation of the modern internet, you can find sites and pages that qualify as the modern definition of a blog or weblog. Although not defined as blogs, these pages were journal entrees, logging the daily life, political/person views, and/or the knowledge of an individual capable of running one of these internet websites. For a long time, the only people with the capacity to create and maintain one of these daily updated websites were people with computer and technology skills and persons associated with these nerds of all trades. This “limited access” made keeping content clean and interesting no problem at all, since the people with access generally had an education along with their brains, a rarity in this day in age. Then, in 1999, LiveJournal.com and Blogger.com were launched and for the first time, weblogs were available to people with little knowledge of computer systems, or even the internet, at all. Now I’m sure most of you know that I’m socialist, and being against a system which allows everyone’s voice to be heard is counterproductive, but bear with me. With the advent of these new “blogging” systems and the wave of new “bloggers” came the massive low IQ crowd to the public eye. For the first time could the village idiot be heard outside of his village, and a sad day it was. 1999 was a pivotal year in the internet, as it was around the time that most people were discovering the internet’s uses and new technology was being developed, finally making the internet a practical device for the general public. If I may quote: “Bloggers are ruining the internet. What are “bloggers”? They’re fat–usually gothic–losers who keep web logs instead of hanging out with friends because they wet the bed and don’t have any. A web log is a type of online diary where people who aren’t important can pretend to be by writing to an imaginary audience. Girls are notorious for keeping these. On a typical site, you’ll find a 17 year old girl with hundreds of webcam pictures of herself pasted everywhere, an Amazon wish list so they can exploit wankers that visit their site, and about 2 gigs worth of text documenting every time they took a shit, had an epiphany about taking a shit or ate something (all written in extremely stylish, yet IMPOSSIBLE TO READ micro-font).” — ©2001 maddox.xmission.com Bloggers I fear will be the undoing of all we computer nerds have worked for. Nobody gives a shit about how good your sandwich was for lunch today, however those bastards at LiveJournal have given you the ability to inform us anyways. The fact of the matter is that the vast majority of bloggers on the net neither have anything interesting to say, nor an audience. Sorry, but that’s the truth. No one reads your shitty journal (and no, 12 visits a month is not considered “heavy traffic”. hell, I’m lucky to top 8000 a month and that still isn’t even a lot of traffic at all). Did you know that there are millions of blogs out there? Millions! On LiveJournal.com there are 5,634,105 blogs and I can guarantee, without a doubt in my mind that 99.9% of those blogs boil down to human feces, and are nothing more than a drain on public resources. No offenses to my friends out there, but a good bit of you really do not write anything interesting… ever. To me, the entire concept is dripping with distain. Even the nickname “blog” sounds a little stupid and childish. I am ever so hesitant to call my own weblog a “blog” because I find the term degrading; hence why I call it a weblog. Don’t like it? Suck a nut. Now I’ll admit, when I first discovered the fad nightmare, I too was interested in these blogs and actually looked into developing a full blog program so that I and my web company could get into the business. However, I became less and less fond of the idea, shut down my blog dedicated server and canceled the project. I’m fairly certain that even my programmer colleague found the whole premise a bit shitty. So Vladimir, the master of all things Argentinean has made you feel like shit because you run a blog? Well I’ll say this, not all blogs are shit. They can’t be. Granted I said that 99.9% of all blogs were shit, but if you look at the LiveJournal statistics alone, 0.1% of those blogs accounts for 563,410 of them, which is being extraordinarily generous to the crowd of “worthwhile blogs”. There are many blogs out there, such as my own (hoorah for being egocentric), that provide worthwhile material to a public, large or small. However, the blogging counterrevolution is doing nothing more than dumbing down the already miniscule intelligence of the average internet browser, almost to the extent of AOL. Help stop plaguing internet with this shitty blog fad by sending a link to your blog to tcp@prodigynetworks.net. Our orthodox committee of highly trained analysts and top notch scientists will determine whether or not your blog blows. If your blog is approved as “A Okay”, then go on, blog to your heart’s content! You’ve earned it! If it is declined as a “big floppy donkey dick”, then go to your blog, shut it down and take solace in the fact that you have succeeded in ridding the internet of one more piece of worthless shit. (5 Comments |Comment on this)
1:32 pm	LJ news post Wow, I'm posting heaps today! I have a lot to rip into, though. Meme deserved a revisit, a classic post was called for, an introspective was needed, and there's this news post that I need to take care of. Congratulations Brad! We don’t mean to break any hearts here, but LiveJournal founder Brad Fitzpatrick is officially off the market. Big congratulations to Brad and Dina who got married in Portland this month. Now [info]frank is still single, but don’t tell that to [info]memethesheep… This is where I found Meme, by the way. Changes to our account names You might have noticed that we changed our account names. What was called "Free" for so many years is now called "Basic" and what launched as "Sponsored+" is now just called "Plus." We made this change to simplify things and to make it clear that both the Basic and Plus accounts are free of charge. Stop talking about it. We get it. LJ Releases We've gotten a lot of feedback from people asking us how they can keep up with the changes to the site. We've created the community [info]lj_releases and we'll be posting there any time we fix bugs or make changes to site features -- feel free to add it to your friends list. Hmm.. part of me wants to see if I can do a rip of that one at some point in the future too... that'll be interesting to look into, but it might not eventuate (you'll have to wait and see!) August is going to be hott Stay tuned for some exciting news next month. We'll be launching LJ Talk, LiveJournal’s own instant messaging service, in the first part of August. You may have heard a little about it already, and there will be even more discussion during OSCON since LJ Talk is a Jabber implementation. You can read the more technical stuff here, or just wait a few weeks until it's ready to launch with some quick and clear instructions as well as an LJ Talk client with powerful voice and chat capabilities. We've been testing it and we're all already addicted! Lte's announce that we're still working on something!! Yay!! (Comment on this)
1:22 pm	The growing OK, everything on the blog seems to be growing. Here's an introspective on the type of posts that have emerged over the last so many months... Classic posts These are standard rips. I find a blog and rip into it as I see fit. This is what started the blog from the beginning. Commentary This is where I talk about blogs in general and the basis of them being shit. I haven't written one of these for a while, though. I hate LJ This is split into two parts. First I just brought up the news posts and talked about how pathetic it is. My killing of that 'SS livejournal' post is the best example of this. The other one is my recent rips of Frank and Meme. This will be an ongoing thing, and I will be bringing them back as I see fit. Comments This is where I post comments I make on other blogs along with their responses. A lot of fun. So there you go. I have fun with these varied ways of overall ripping. Great stuff. (Comment on this)
12:59 pm	Back to a classic post It's been a while since I've done a 'classic' post. I've spent the last few posts focussing largely on my 'I hate livejournal' side, so this time I decided to go back to the basics and rip a blog, old school style. So here it is, the target blog for the rip... http://love-is-death67.livejournal.com/ Title: Love to Suffer Pointless questions! What color is your microwave?: white What was the last thing you ate?: a hotdog in a hotdog bun w/ musturd Do you talk to people even though you hate them?: oh yes, it's fun Name something you have always wanted and never got.: a penis What is your middle name?: Donea When was the last time you went outside?: this afternoon How many hours do you spend on the computer a day?: at least 5 Do you have any siblings?: yea Do you know someone named Curt?: nope, wonder why though Have you ever been to Texas?: no How often are you home?: all the time What's your shoe size?: 7--8-1/2 Do you have an alarm clock?: yup Can you play the piano?: no Do you go to church?: no What color was the cup that you last drank out of?: blue and white What did you wear yeterday?: human clothes..duh What is the show that you watched when you were little and you still do?: tom and jerry What's the background on your cellphone?: a lily 2 things you hate: very shallow, selfish, ignorant people, and green peppers Do you have shoes on?: no Do you have a printer?: yea Do you read the paper?: sometimes Do you make cookies?: yea What is your favorite thing from Dairy Queen?: a hot fudge sundae w/ nuts Have you ever been to camp?: no What color is your keybored?: cream Do you have a swingset?: no What is something you do every summer?: make a list of things i wanna accomplish b4 summer is over Do you have a job?: no Take this survey | Find more surveys You've been totally Bzoink*d I think this should have been titled: pointless post. Just wanted to tell everyone I'm moving. See ya'll in South Carolina. Bye. Unbeknownst to everyone, she already lives in South Carolina, and she was referring to her leaving the house. Just wanna let people know I'm alive. So I'ma say...moo and meow and moo(again). Bye-erz. Ahh yes, another pointless post in a blog. These are a waste of time for everyone involved. "Awake, yet never truly alive, I seek valuation beyond reality" Life is unfullfilling for you, and you aren't very fond of it. What you like is your own imaginative world, which can be your daydreams, stories you write or anything similar. You always prefer that before the actual life. To people you come off as quite lonesome, and you may wish you had more friends, but you are more of a hoper than someone who takes action. That is how you remain lonely. Or maybe you just don't find anyone who you can relate to. Inside you feel empty, like you are missing something important that you can't quite put a finger on what it is. Somehow you wish to be swept away from the normality and led into something extraordinary. This has yet to happen, and you keep on feeling dissapointed with the little that life has to offer. At least you continue to express yourself through art/writing/poems/daydreaming. Take this quiz! What's with people and stupid quizzes online??? I mentioned this a little in my last post; they're fucking stupid. Just wanted to say "hi" and to let people know I haven't died. **Squeeze your balls and cough if you care...lol** Oh my...see how the winds have carved the stones these years. Woo, yeah! Go those meaningless posts! I haven't updated in a very long time(at least to here). Nothing is really new. Still boring and stuff. Ok well, bye. Oh yea, and I saw you naked in the shower. lol. Funny. All I gotta say is...................MoO! Are you saying that you are a cow? I might elaborate on this rip later, depending on a lot of factors. Interest, for one. Blogs are shit, this is shit, I couldn't be bothered thinking of a different wording for this last bit! Dave (Comment on this)
12:50 pm	My actual Meme the sheep rip http://memethesheep.livejournal.com title: Meme the Sheep OK, I introduced you all to the idea of Meme. Well, here's a proper rip of this blog now that you all are used to the idea of this stupid extrapolation of the Frank idea. IF YOU READ THIS YOU MUST POST THIS SENTENCE IN YOUR OWN JOURNAL: "Hi, my name is FRANK, and I'm a JERK" Current Mood: crushed Hmm... OK, the story is that 'Meme' is obsessed with 'Frank'. This is witnessed by the hideous background that proclaims this. Note- it's impossible to read your garbage with that background. Change it. You'll Find Love Online Dating in meatspace is way too complicated and time consuming for you You rather find a ton of guys at the click of a button So go on, and have some fun in your online dating adventure Just make sure perfectguy@mrright.com is who he says he is Woo. Way to go, post commercials on there. LJ, stop doing that shit. Your Love Quote I was nauseous and tingly all over. I was either in love or I had smallpox. You Are a Fierce Femme You have a wild side, and you aren't afraid to bring it out when the time is right. But you also know when to hang back and keep your "crazy chick" persona in check. In fact, some of your friends may be surprised to find out how far you can take it... You may look mild mannered, but it's all an act! What You Know About Your Guy: Practically Everything You have gotten to know your man really well From his hopes and dreams to favorite things... You definitely have enough info to figure out if he's *the* guy In fact, you may know him a little better than you know yourself How Well Do You Know Your Man? There's HEAPS of this shit on here. This blog seems to be little more than a collection of shit quiz online things that are shit. Move on from that crap and either a- post something new or b- die. That's all the blog really is! It's so fucking shit because it's all repetitive stuff- what colour lightsabre are you? quiz, what awful book are you? quiz. blogs are shit, this is boringly shit, fuck off! Later! ps the spell chack doesn't recognise the word 'blog'! (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Monday, August 21st, 2006
2:38 am	My addition to the news comments section There are a lot of things influencing the intruduction of LJ chat. The first is the fact the people who run LJ are shaped. They used all their bandwidth downloading midget porn. The second is that since they downloaded so much midget porn they are quite busy watching it and cleaning their keyboards. The third is that they need something to keep mentioning in their news, so they are keeping it off so they can have more 'filler' The fourth is that like many people who have blogs, the staff at LJ are actually monkey-human hybrids genetically spliced to write inane entries. http://news.livejournal.com/92728.html?view=37347896#t37347896 If you want to read any responses. (Comment on this)
2:26 am	What the fuck?? Meme the sheep http://memethesheep.livejournal.com/ Title: Meme the Sheep So far it's just a page with pictures of Frank the goat (see below) and how much she loves him. I hate it so much. (Comment on this)
Thursday, August 10th, 2006
3:10 am	Frank the fucking goat http://frank.livejournal.com/ Title: Frank the Goat OK, now, here we have Frank the Goat. I hate him. On the home page there's picture of this fucker. Hover you r cursor over his picture and it says 'Frank says baa'. I've held back ripping this for a while, but now it's time to really rip the shit out of this pathetic piece of crap. Holiday! Oh sure, everyone knows today is Cinco de Mayo. But did you also know today is No Pants Day? I'm trying to decide how I can best celebrate this holiday, since I don't wear pants anyway. Do I fast for spiritual cleansing (are pants like chametz today)? Or do I engorge myself in those pants left behind by those frolicking in the streets of Austin and Atlanta? I leave it to you to decide: Poll #723100 Open to: All, results viewable to: All No Pants Day: Wear no pants; eat no pants Wear no pants; EAT ALL PANTS With this he included the following picture: Ugh. interns taking over livejournal! You wouldn't believe what happened tonight. The interns tried to take over LiveJournal! Those punks thought I wouldn't be able to interfere, just because I've been keeping my head down and not chewing on the printer cables lately. But oh, how wrong they are. I've been suspecting they've been plotting this for a while, which is why I've been hiding -- not updating my journal, waiting for them all to forget me. Biding my time. Waiting for this day. And now I have been vindicated, and my plan has paid off! I'm perfectly fine up here in the crow's nest, and I'll be launching the counter-resistance as soon as things settle down a little more. I'd like to think that the absense of updates is due to the fact that the staff at LJ realised for a while that this is a really stupid project and thus didn't post for a while. However, stupidity took over and posts resumed. Ooh, interns. I don't care. The LJ staff, on the other hoof, weren't quite as lucky -- burr86 chained them all to the Support boards. Let's hope they stay there! Who knows what they'd do if they broke their chains. Can you imagine them running around? Unsupervised! It makes my fur stand on end just to think about that! Good thing Abe locked them up; I sure could use a night off from overseeing LiveJournal. It's a tiring job, making sure everyone stays out of trouble. Does that count me? But revmischa. I'm not too happy with him. He wants to get rid of me! He wants to replace me with a one-eyed parrot named Bert! Okay, he's probably a cute one-eyed parrot named Bert, but that's besides the point. He wants to get rid of me! Haven't I been good to you, Mischa? Am I not kind? Am I not merciful? Oh no you di-int. I want to replace you with something worth reading, like... well, the worst book ever written. (the worst one I have read has got to be 'Cops: the Movie'. It was soooooo shit. Couldn't get past 10 pages). Posted at 02:01 am | Link | Baaaaa! | 135 comments | Add to Memories 135 comments on that post??????? Holy fuck. Oh, my hooves, my aching, aching hooves. The life of a last-minute reindeer substitute is hard, let me tell you. I can't give away any of the trade secrets on how Santa manages to make deliveries to all those houses in such a short time, because I had to sign a non-disclosure agreement, but let me just say that it's a LOT harder than it looks on those animated holiday specials on TV. We had a great night, though, and we got a LOT done, and thank you to everyone who left out pants for me to munch on! (They were really, really good. Especially this pair of superwashed denim that I found in an apartment just outside of Cleveland. Except I don't think I was supposed to eat those, so, uh, if any of you guys got a pair of gift pants with a bite out of the rear, I'm sorry...) And then I got home and found that for the first night of Hanukkah -- we goats are nondenominational, you know, and we celebrate most human holidays and a whole bunch of our own -- someone had given me the best gift ever: a pair of hoof slippers ... with built-in massagers. So I am kicking back in the goathouse, with my four vibrating slippers on my poor aching hooves and a glass of eggnog, and I will see you all again after the New Year! (PS: Enjoy the icon of me eating Santa's pants. I kind of got in trouble for it, but at least I waited until we were back at the Pole to take a bite.) Posted at 01:24 am | Link | Baaaaa! | 129 comments | Add to Memories I get the growing feeling like I am attacking a 'sacred goat', to follow the terrible sense of humour in this 'blog'. It's not a blog; it's the staff being stupid. Shut the fuck up! Why do people keep replying to it? Full House A lot of people don't realize this, but a whole bunch of the people who work on LJ don't actually live in San Francisco. This week, everyone who works remotely visited us here in the office, and today we had an off-site meeting of the whole LJ team -- myself included! -- to plan out what we're going to be doing in 2006. I wanted to spill some of the details, but everyone voted me down! "Frank," they said, "what about the element of surprise? What about that moment when people load their friends page and see the news post announcing something new and cool? What about the sixty pages of people saying 'oh wow, thank you!'?" I wasn't quite convinced, so they said "here, let us show you", and gave people a bunch of really cool things this morning. "Okay, okay," I said, "maybe you have a point." "But Frank, you're just a fictional character that we made up to entertain idiots" I have the office to myself! Ha! Everyone went home for the weekend, and left me all alone in the office. "Frank, you'll be okay by yourself, right?" they said. Mwah. Ha. Ha. Will I be all right by myself? I'll be fine. You might come back to find that I've eaten all the cables to the print server... Although -- I do have one request. Hey, guys in the office? Can you make the fridge more hooves-friendly? I managed to get the door open, but I couldn't quite manage the pop-top on the Diet Coke cans. I had to bite the can open. Apologize to the cleaning people for me, will you? I thought there would be some mention of the difficulty of masturbating to internet porn in the office with only hooves... Actually, if he's supposed to be a goat, how does he type? Anyway, time to backup my posts... Blogs are shit, by gum this is shit! Dave (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 9th, 2006
5:03 pm	New and improved! OK, I'm sure it's something that you all didn't expect but I'm listening to some critique! From now on, quotes will be in italics to make things easier to understand. http://nott-dark.livejournal.com/ Title: I mewn 'r bantiau This is a blog with not much in it, so there's not much to work with. However, when I spotted it, I decided that a rip was in order. Here's the two posts: September 30th 1997 It's horribly quiet at here at Hogwarts. There's only a handful of Slytherins that have returned and not that many more from the other Houses. Daphne's gone and although she was very quiet, she's left a gaping hole in the common room. She hasn't written, maybe I should write. She was never going to choose a side. I wish I was that brave. I knew Blaise wasn't coming back - I'm slightly less certain about which way he's going to jump. That's the million Gaellon question. When push comes to shove, which way are people going to jump. At least, no one is nagging me when I have the light on half the night. That got very dull very quickly. October 14th 1998 I always knew that he would get killed. My father was too old to be running around on the whims of a madman even if he did say the right things. Apparently it was an attack and they killed Padma Patil. I don’t know why they picked her. She was a sweet girl and was training to be a Mediwitch. I remember her from school and she was just nice. She always said hello to me in the library and didn’t mind sharing a table with me even after the war was declared in earnest. Why her? The Patils are a good family – they mind their own business and even though they have not been in England as long as the more established families such as the Blacks, they were well respected. Her death made me realise that I had made the right decision in going against my father. Anyone who could just kill someone on a whim or for a bit of sport can never be a good person – no matter how much they mouth off about blood lines and purity. I suppose the Aurors did me a favour in killing him. At least then, I can start trying to return to a quiet life. I don’t expect that will be any time soon. Hmm... Now, this blog... sort of makes sense... I think. I noticed the word 'Hogwarts' which I suppose means that this blog is based around Harry Potter in some way. I haven't read the books and was forced to sit through two of the movies, which are shite. However, apart from the fact that Harry is a wizard and the bearded bloke says more than "you're a wizard Harry" in the movie I watched, I know very little about this series (I prefer reading other books, such as '2001: a Space Odyssey' by Arthur C Clarke, and 'State Building' by Francis Fukuyama. Anyway, back to the rip and away from self indulgence- it was starting to sound too much like a blog entry, heavens forbid. Anyway... what is that all about?? It seems that it is people talking about Harry Potter from the perspective of the characters for some bizarre reason... I don't know... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Thursday, August 3rd, 2006
2:11 pm	Funny userpic Well, I finally found one that I consider worthy of this blog. This is the real logo of a real medical institute. Quite... poorly designed, methinks. (Comment on this)
Monday, July 31st, 2006
12:30 am	Blogs Are Shit http://www.blogsareshit.com I love it! (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, July 30th, 2006
12:05 am	News thingy... i hate livejournal Changes to our account names You might have noticed that we changed our account names. What was called "Free" for so many years is now called "Basic" and what launched as "Sponsored+" is now just called "Plus." We made this change to simplify things and to make it clear that both the Basic and Plus accounts are free of charge. What the hell is this all about anyway? The admins here seem obsessed with changing labels and names. What's the point of doing that?? Good news for Plus users We’re still trying to deliver on our promise that LJ does ads differently. So we’re excited to announce that the hundreds of thousands of Plus account users can now select the placement of the ads in their journal and Friends page. Visit the Ad Settings page to choose to display horizontally at the top and bottom of the page, or vertically on the right or left side of the page. Basic users can switch to a Plus account to get more features for free. Yay! I can customise where I want my commercials to be!!! Let's have a poll!! August is going to be hott Stay tuned for some exciting news next month. We'll be launching LJ Talk, LiveJournal’s own instant messaging service, in the first part of August. You may have heard a little about it already, and there will be even more discussion during OSCON since LJ Talk is a Jabber implementation. You can read the more technical stuff here, or just wait a few weeks until it's ready to launch with some quick and clear instructions as well as an LJ Talk client with powerful voice and chat capabilities. We've been testing it and we're all already addicted! What is jabber implementation? Why am I asking? (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, July 29th, 2006
12:56 am	Holy fuck. http://community.livejournal.com/cbarriepictures/ Title: The Chris Barrie Photo Archive Many thanks to my contributor, who I am guessing will prefer to remain anonymous. This is a fucking insane Chris Barrie fan site. I like Red Dwarf. However, these people go 15,000 steps too far. I have not included everything that disturbed me, only the ones that show how much therapy is needed. Here's some crazy stuff there is on the blog: Here we go now. First episode of “The Brittas Empire”. Different sort of capping experience but did try my very hardest to get a decent number of screencaps. He smiles a lot more than Rimmer does, which is always good, but I think his eyebrows are permanently attached just below his hairline :) A few Rimmeresque faces in there as well hee. There's a lot of posts like this. Well, it is a blog that's all about photos... of... Chris Barrie. I see... With the assistance of [info]kahvi (she graciously chose the individual episodes for each series. Some may look the same and if that is the case, blame her hee), I have decided to post a slightly silly poll on which Rimmer hair do you like best. As we know, the series progressed as did Rimmer's hair. I'm pretty sure that most people on here have a favourite hairstyle and this is your opportunity to vote for your favourite. :) As I said back there, some of the hairstyles make look the same but if you're here, you probably know the difference. :) Heh. Oh dear. Ahhh – “Pete: Part 2”. After a bit of wait whilst Photobucket decided to do maintenance, I’ve finally been able to upload this episode. As a two parter, “Pete” is a decent enough episode. The extended explanation from Hollister in this part drives me spare though. Lots of Rimmer/Lister shots in this one. Some rather slashy. Also, the last shot is a bonus shot for you all. It distracted me for quite some time. It's interesting that thes post likes Pete:part 2 while most threads I have read in the official forum have said that it's shit. Oh, is it because there's a scene where he wears only two pieces of paper? You make me sick. And onto “Pete: Part One”. I actually quite enjoy this half of the two-parter. Not sure why but there’s just something nice about watching Rimmer & Lister being rather chummy and best matey. Heh. Of course, this has the naked scene in it which makes it all worthwhile. =) Ahh, honesty. There was always going to be a huge explosion of caps when I got to this episode. There’s just something about that jacket and his post shag hair that just makes me go flibbildy wibbildy. Heh. *faints* 36 stands out as an OMGHAWTYUM shot. Hee. His hair is pretty funny looking when he goes to see Lister … *grins* Hee! Do I even need to say anything to this? There are a lot of scary pics on this site... and I'm not clicking on any of the hyperlinks!! This episode has so many licks in it, it isn’t funny! Rimmer’s tongue pokes out so many bloody times … Not to mention my new interest in Rimmer’s balls. The worry ones, dammit! Did someone turn up the 'what the fuck' meter? Oh yeah, there are heaps of polls like: I've done a cut down but I'm not sure whether the votes will change much at all ... We'll see. Go back here for Round 1 poll. Also, the series II costume that has won is the Admiral costume! =) I will post some shots of the lovely white uniform this evening when I get home. Anyway, once again, happy voting!!! Poll #686603 Series III Costumes - Round 2 Open to: All, results viewable to: None Which of these series III costumes do you like best? Give Quiche A Chance Green Silky PJs Leather Tuxedo Oh! For all you "Lick" fans, I got as many licking shots as I could. I personally like Smeg-up #5 which I am using as my avatar *grins* Heee. OK, I have been told that these people seem to think that shots of Chris Barrie licking his lips is... arousing in some way. I'm not trying to joke with you. Gah! He looks gorgeous in them especially numbers three and four. Four makes me knees go weak *grins* Yum Yum! He's just an actor. Get over it. Anyway, so there is the lowlights of this disturbing blog. In the past I have ripped shit blogs, but this is shit because it is disturbing. I like Barrie's acting. He is a good actor. I have red dwarf DVDs. That's as far as I will go. Yes I am male; but I don't have screenshots of Kochanski everywhere. Blogs are shit, this is fucking disturbing and shit, fuck!!! (12 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 25th, 2006
4:10 am	Ha ha, motherfucker. http://lauraxrae.livejournal.com/ Title: Jam Out With Your Clam Out Now, I knew I was on a winner when I saw the title. Anyway, here's the rip... my p.o is letting me go to california hahahahahahahahahahahaha crazy bastard Woo, yeah, exciting. What the fuck does PO mean? Post Office? I suppose if I cared I would know. But, I don't. So... yeah. i think ill make an amaretto cheesecake today... Then a recipe. Umm... maybe you should leave updating until you have something interesting to write about... this is just pathetic. Maybe you should blog the meal options you have and wait for the suggestions... just as interesting as that post. Current Mood: [mood icon] headache .....and its fuckin weird.... i have to go get drunk tonight.... and for once im not looking forward to it *le sigh* Umm... why not actually go out and then do a post about what the night was like?? However, this did not happen. What am I saying?? God damn, this is getting out of hand, I'm starting to actually give advice, that's starting to freak me out. Shut the fuck up whoever you are!! I don't care!! Ahh, much better. Blogs are shit, this is shit, man, I think I need to go and have a rest. Gaaaak!!! (10 Comments |Comment on this)
4:02 am	What?? http://vaydega.livejournal.com/ Title: My Other Self I would rip this one, but... I can't follow the fucking thing! It's written by a gamer and... well... since I don't live online playing WOW and other such games, it makes no sense! There have been horror stories of bad pulls, OMGWTFLINKs, and "Death houses". Tensions were pretty high. I got disconnected ½way through and was pretty pissed/worried. (I was the main sleeper...) Once I reconnected everything was ok again. No major worries or anything. There was a wipe I think, but it didnt really slow down progress. What the fuck is that all about?? However, it's got to be shit, because it's all about gaming, and what sort of a blog is that?? Blogs are shit, this has GOT to be shit, fuckin' gamers with their 1337 shit!! (6 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 19th, 2006
1:58 pm	Monkeys Blogs are proof that a million monkeys with a million typewriters will not make the world's greatest novel. (1 Comment |Comment on this)